Divorce is a confusing, emotional time. Not only are you venturing into a territory you do not know, but you are also dealing with an entire life change. It is not uncommon to feel lost and wonder what you are supposed to do next in the process. You should always consult your family law attorney to find out specifically what you should and should not do during the divorce process, as it pertains to your particular case.
How you act during your divorce can determine much of the future, and could impact you the rest of your life. It is especially important to know what not to do – since there are innocent acts that could become detrimental to the divorce case, as well as your life.
Divorce Don’ts
- Do not isolate yourself from family and friends. You may have some friends that side with your spouse during the divorce process; this is completely normal. It’s important to remember that you still have friends and family. No matter how you are feeling, avoid isolating yourself socially. Now is the time to attend family events and social gatherings, and take opportunities to be around others.
- Do not start bad habits. Whether it is drinking, smoking or just sitting on the couch with ice cream all day, divorce is not about falling into bad habits. Instead, use it as an opportunity to wash away any bad habits and develop good ones in their place.
- Do not play the blame game. It is easier to blame someone than admit things just went wrong. But, it will not help your recovery. Avoid blaming your ex, your job, yourself, or anything else. Try to accept the reality as it is.
- Do not assume. Your case may not be textbook, and while it may seem like it would go your way, there are situations in which it may not. Assume nothing, so that you are not disappointed or caught off guard in court.
- Do not involve children. While you may go through custody battles with your ex, your children do not need to hear about these battles. They also do not need to hear negative things about their father or mother, or feel as though they have to choose sides.
- Do not refuse to communicate. You will need to speak with your ex – especially if you have children. Do what you can to remain civil, but don’t refuse to communicate altogether.
- Do not hide your assets. If you have assets your soon-to-be-ex doesn’t know about, do not try to hide them. Doing so could result in serious penalties with the courts and harm your overall case.
- Do not ignore your attorney’s advice. Your attorney is there to be a neutral resource. He or she will act as a voice of reason for you at a time where emotions are high. If your attorney advises you to do something, it is in your best interest. So, try not to ignore the advice.
- Do not assume you get everything. Sometimes, one spouse among a divorcing couple assumes that he or she will receive everything and the other spouse will receive nothing. In California, assets are divided equally – and equally does not always mean 50/50.
- Do not expect your spouse to act rationally. No one can predict how people will act during a divorce; you may be surprised by the attitude of your soon-to-be ex. To make it easier, go into mediation and negotiations without expecting your spouse to act as he or she did while you were married.
Contact Sarieh Law Offices, ALC Today
If you are planning to divorce, contact an Orange County divorce attorney who can guide you through the process. Sarieh Law Offices, ALC can help. Call us for a free 30-minute consultation at 714-542-6200 or fill out our online contact form with your questions.
