How to Divorce with Dignity
Divorce is not an easy process – even if you are the one initiating the proceeding. Regardless of how long you were married, divorce takes an emotional toll that no one expects and no one can prepare for adequately enough. With emotions heightened, it is easy to act unlike yourself. But, it is important to do what you can to divorce with dignity and keep your own self-respect intact – regardless of how your spouse reacts to the process.
Tips for Keeping Your Dignity
- 1. Speak to your spouse. Talk with your spouse and make sure that you both agree that a divorce is the right option. Sometimes, a legal separation or time apart are better options at first – rather than an actual divorce. Look at areas where you are not in agreement, and see if there is hope through counseling. Also, develop a budget, so that each of you know how much you will need if you do separate. Decide where you will live, how the children will be handled, etc. The more you can work out prior to meeting with an attorney, the easier the process could be.
- 2. Discuss minor children in detail. It may be difficult to speak to a person who you are about to divorce, but it is not about you; it is about your children. You and your spouse need to decide how you will work out custody, what type of parenting plan that you will establish, and the amount of child support that may work.
- 3. Discuss assets and debts. This is critical. You and your spouse need to discuss the marital debts and assets. Make a list of those that you can recall and have your spouse do the same. Discuss options for how you will take care of any marital debts – if you can.
- 4. Do not use social media. While you can be on social media, you do not need to broadcast your divorce on there. Instead, remain private about those personal relationship issues, and do not worry about your status updates.
- 5. Do not use any go-between people. While it may be tempting to use a third party to discuss issues with your spouse, you should do so on your own or have an attorney do so for you. Some friends and family members want to be in the middle of the drama, and they can actually fuel the fire – making your divorce harder to complete.
- 6. Get a support group going. Make sure that you have family and good friends closeby who can offer support. Get out and visit, and try to avoid self-destruction or self-alienation. If you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed or depressed, seek professional counseling.
- 7. Be ready and willing to compromise. Divorce is not all about you or all about “getting back at” your spouse. Instead, you need to compromise, negotiate, and walk away satisfied. Your attorney will protect your rights, and ensure that you are not losing out on any assets, but you will still need to be open to negotiations.
Thinking of a Divorce? Explore Your Options by Contacting an Orange County Divorce Attorney
If you are thinking of filing for divorce, contact Sarieh Law Offices, ALC today. We can assist you through the divorce or separation process. Schedule a free 30-minute consultation now at 714-542-6200 or fill out our online contact form with your questions.